Second Chances

I've been thinking about second chances constantly lately. As an adult, think about all the times you've been given a second chance.

I am not a perfect wife, but my husband gives me second chances all the time. 

I tried to make cookies once with baking soda that was 2 years expired. They didn't turn out so great, but I have had other chances to bake things and I learned a value lesson about baking soda : )

I tried out for my church praise team and didn't make it. It was embarrassing and for a while I didn't feel like singing or playing the piano, but I can try out again and if I don't get so nervous next time, maybe I'll make it. I'm not banned forever because of one audition.

I took the ACT twice when I was in high school, and my highest score was the only one colleges cared about. 

My first year of teaching, I struggled quite a bit with classroom management. I needed more time and unfortunately first-hand experience to just begin learning how to deal with difficult students. 

I hated making this list... I almost erased all of them because they are things about myself that I don't want anyone to know. I wish everything I had ever done and everything I will do in the future could just be perfect the first time. I would save myself from embarrassment and guilt and feelings of inadequacy. 

I don't think anyone reading this expects me to be perfect. Think about your second chances. 

No really. Stop reading and think about a time when you needed a second chance because your first attempt wasn't good enough. 

Do you like being forced to think about the times when you've needed a redo or some grace because you messed up? It's uncomfortable. But in every one of my examples I see two common trends.

1. I had good intentions. I was putting forth effort. I didn't need a redo because I was lazy or irresponsible. 

2. I learned something. I've learned better ways to communicate and listen to my husband since we think like complete opposites. I've learned that you shouldn't use old baking soda to make food. I've learned about giving kids clear expectations and remaining calm when students are misbehaving. I've learned that there's a pretty big difference between playing the piano in jazz band and playing the piano during a prayer at church. 

What if I hadn't been given a second chance? I would be divorced. I wouldn't be a teacher. I would be bitter and defensive. Colleges would have thought I was much less ready for post-secondary. I would give up in so many of these areas. I wouldn't want to bother singing or playing the piano or trying in school if my major test (ACT) was done once and for all. I wouldn't want to bake anything. I would give up trying to be a good wife or friend or person because once you mess up once, what's the point?

The point is that second chances give us hope. The biggest failure of all on my part is that I let God down. I don't just need a redo, I need a savior because my sins are something that I can't get right on my 2nd or 3rd or 1000th attempt. God believes in giving second chances, so who am I as a teacher to refuse a second chance to a student of mine? I can be joyful when I'm upset and have hope that God cares about me and is in control of my life because he has given me a second chance.

Why would I deprive a student of hope? If they have an F, and they know there is no recovering (not really) from such a low grade, what reason do they  have to really try? They might do better on every other test we take, but they'll know they can only raise their grade so much. Even if they can get to a B, I've told them that their one failure is going to stay and look them in the face for the rest of the semester. They didn't get it right the first time, so they can just think about how bad they did until the end of the semester. And I expect that to "motivate" them to try harder on the next test? This might light a fire under some students, but there will always be that awful nagging feeling that they aren't ever going to be good enough and what is the point... 

What makes education so special that we get to be the ones to dictate when someone learns something? If my principal had dictated when I would have perfected handling classroom management issues, I would never have made it to where I am. Some people say that kids should be able to handle studying and being prepared for their Algebra 2 test once they reach that level in their education. Could the same thing have been said of me during my first year as a teacher? I had been through all the schooling. I had studied and practiced like I was supposed to. I just needed more time and a different mode (real life) of education to teach me what I needed to know. 

I want to teach my students:

to keep learning

to keep trying to improve

to work hard, and then to adjust when they realize mistakes

not to give up when they try and fail

not to lose hope when they aren't perfect

that much is expected of them, and to work hard when they don't reach the expectation the first time.

All of these things require second chances, and that's why I believe in giving them.